Tag: Cuckold Angst

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Unfaithful Inversion

A fleeting annihilation in lust;
cheating is violation of trust…
cheating is hurtful and
cheating is slighting…
cheating is nothing that I find exciting.

What I find enthralling
which some find confusing
and may seem appalling
but really is choosing to probe my identity
satisfy wondering
disrobe obscenity
nullify suffering
to simulate danger
emulate fantasy
to stimulate strangers
and affirm our humanity.

And I know it’s perplexing;
I’m so complicated…
and I’m far from perfecting
what we’ve consummated…
but the point is just this:
no more unfaithfulness…
I want to persist but
not with such painfulness…
inverting portrayal
underscored with disgust…
reverse of betrayal:
exploring of trust.

Written by Jason Wright
August 26, 2018

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Self Medicating

Migraine med blitz is
confusion and sleep…

Lust without sensation.
Trust with augmentations.

His imagined betrayal
is hotter than
anyone’s physical loyalty.

Written by Jason Wright
August 7, 2018

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Start of Darkness

After night of
angry exhausted questions…

Loaded with
doubt / jealousy / rejections…

Expressing the pain
and the pleasure we feel…

My bitch of a stomach
could not seal the deal.

Tears fall from eyes
I’ve rinsed and repeatedly
cleaned as I’ve organized
words that defeated
and tore me asunder
like peace disappeared
with the heat of the summer
and ice of my fears
with soul crushing weight
of tears from my lover:

We all know the heart is the loneliest hunter.

I’m so very tired
and I’ve hated this night…

But my symptoms are clear
and I know what is right.

I hurt him with thoughts
that he never guessed.

Jealous reminder
of that man undressed.

Devouring fear
that seldom ignores me,

As Aaron convinces…
As Aaron implores me
to live my own life
in spite of my sickness.

My life of death
undone by our quickness.

Tonight illness won
and I know deep regret.

Time to wake up
and I haven’t slept yet.

Written by Jason Wright
July 21, 2018

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The Wicked Samaritan

He stops for the man
who is married to dread

and he tops for that man
who is buried in bed

he doesn’t confess this

just gives me his mixture

to soothe and undress with
dishonest elixir

which damns us together
in lust and veracity

stranded forever
in thrust haunted chastity

you envy this bleakness
where no one consoles me

Men need their secrets
as someone once told me

for honesty complicates
just as deception

consciously motivates
trust as erection

as I read the words
unconfessed by my spouse

I die when: “I want your dick in my mouth.”

the pain is intense
but the lust is mutation

insane that incensed
I conduct masturbation

Written by Jason Wright
July 15, 2018

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Dishonesty

July says goodbye
heading east into August…

The truth is a lie
or at least it’s not honest…

For “the truth” is deceptive;
the term’s a mirage
which no contraceptive
confirms with applause.

Your secret is known
and your lies are the truth…

Turning flesh into stone
despised by my youth.

Written by Jason Wright
July 15, 2018

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The Strain

One year ago tonight
you whispered
into my unhearing ears

with the flick of your tongue
across my lover’s desperate flesh

over oceans of thought, fear and lust
you joined that which was mine
while never knowing or desiring
my anatomy.

You, who knew not
to be yourself
except reflected in strange foreign eyes
which we have separately drowned in,
we have shared that beautiful body.

I am nothing to you
but an invisible partner
who plagues not your existence,
a ghost that is haunted
by tiny little deaths
which interred you both
on sweet Budapest fabrics
to the strains of Porgy and Bess.

You were musical phrases
that created a distinct melody
of an already exotic piece,
a hunger I may yet understand
but will never truly experience.

That night I was lost in your tonal pattern,
deafened by an overwhelming silence
which inspired want and hatred,
pity and indifference,
a longing that may never be satiated.

I say “your”
though the stress was not singular –
it was a harmony
that brought me to tears,
tore at my soul & ripped me apart,
boiling me down to my essence.

You were a crucible
by which all fear was melted away,
an intersection in which,
by way of paradox,
he and I were joined in honest surrender,
a yielding so keen
that it’s wounding pleasure
healed the breach,
sealed the rift,
and eased the strain
until nothing could keep us apart.

Written by Jason Wright
June 25, 2018

For Zsolt Krasznár & Aaron Sanko

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What Did I Miss?

I missed you today.
[Same Space / No Connection]
My fault, I know…

I hope my lurking
didn’t make you uncomfortable.

I hope tonight will give you
what my presence lacks.

Hope you can help w/ my phone and SNAP
without frustration or exhaustion
because I’m terrified of failure.

More than two months without therapy
and I continue to struggle
with simple exercises of balance and breath.

I’m losing Jennifer
and I could lose myself if I’m not careful.

Need to connect with you –
with him –
with myself more often…

                     Honest
                     Lust
       Terrified of: Lost
                     in
                     Lies

The frightening power when you
stroke the keys –

to make me whimper, weep,
make me cum
with threatened / promised action!

I’m addicted.

Junkie grovelling for scraps
of a childhood seduction.

Breathe my dreams to life.

Because Honest
Lust
Lifted
in
Longing

            may free me from this horrible freedom.
            allow me to smile at my expensive joke.
            to strip lust naked & make it my slave
            until tricks rob me of your magic
            and kneel me down
            to worship all that I missed today.

Written by Jason Wright
October 24, 2017

For Aaron

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Others Required

Afraid of desire
admitted and costly,

Albeit in whispers
of words spoken softly,

Enacted in moments
of uncertain pleasure,

Confused by reactions
of others unfettered,

By reason or choice
by manipulation,

To play the long game
I must not be impatient,

Yet I want it all
and I want it all now,

I must lay claim
to all I’ve disavowed.

Written by Jason Wright
August 4, 2017

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A Cuckold Remembers

Diminished by instance
of alcohol anal,

Innocent witnesses
lust and betrayal,

Combines what he sees
in a powerful mixture,

Laced with unease
to offset elixir.

A cocktail of horrors:
salacious addictions,

Supreme satisfaction
despite contradictions,

Which heighten delight
and gratify longing,

Even as he is abused
while he’s watching.

He might shit his pants
as he contemplates pleasure,

Is this abject lust
or a shade of stark terror?

Flaccid, electric,
unsure and ashamed.

The faggot is limp
but inside he’s inflamed.

Internal struggles,
Spiritual / Bodily,

Embarrassed, Self-Conscious,
Ignominious: audibly.

A blush as the rush
liquefies and then exits,

Assuagement replaced
by miserable wetness,

The others are laughing
and fuck him in tandem,

Surrounded by men
he’s completely abandoned.

Time seems to stop
like a licentious dream,

Betrayal and lust:
contentiousness team,

Combined as a drug
they inspire enslavement,

He’s never known pleasure
that matched this debasement.

And now understanding
this sacrilege holy,

Consumed in an instant
must be enjoyed slowly,

He’ll return to this moment
in lust filled reflection,

And he will shed tears
as he strokes his erection.

Written by Jason Wright
July 26, 2017

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Sexy Traitor

I instruct him
in destruction;
in my need for his seduction…

And he rises
to occasion;
nearly late from masturbation…

I run for trains with courage found,
Express train travel:
Brooklyn bound…

I feel ill from my confusion,
Sex drenched ultimate illusion,
Might cost more than just my soul:

Excess lust within control.

Written by Jason Wright
July 26, 17

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