Men’s eyes can be laughing sparkle, heavy lidded with hunger or stupor, dead with rejection, ghosted with tears, shaded with guyliner, or frosted with burning hatred.
All that matters is that they stare if only momentarily into my own.
That mind jolt penetrating to the core of inspiration.
That look a month ago – with listen and spark, sex and magic – has yet to be replaced or forgotten.
There are waves of imaginary men rolling toward us with intended potential excitement but they seem empty, devoid of spark.
Aaron squared was more than a somewhat clever joke.
Expanded healing pleasure / honest friendship, minus the fantasy lies that fuel countless tear stained orgasms with an intense burst of impossible wet dream madness; a bruising lust which stings while it drives senses to extremes – a Cenobite encounter plagued by hardships with luscious pleasures yet to be realized, yet to curse or release me through a torturous curative of transformative sex.
My lover’s name twin is sweet and tempts me with poli-normative affection… he shames me with his goodness in the shadowed eclipse of my darkest desires.
His double penetrations are pure spiritual retreats which offer to halt my advance into the endless abyss of my deviant sex drenched day dreams.
I still struggle toward the depths but their darkness seems twice as blinding after his personal brand of effervescent sparks.
Reading old words written by younger self with partial memories stirred, fleeting moments recorded, stolen experiences lost in time, with these bone fragments left behind to ponder / decipher…
I thought it quite hopeless: the sinking of sailors this future of men historical failures regardless of numbers of men you’ve seen naked when love is your goal then truth is what’s sacred.
You find what is right divided your vanity profound and forthright provided profanity your life can be balanced to challenge insanity your strife can be silenced by licensed humanity.
Confession is destined to threaten the legend with ill timing rhymes keeping time with suggestions of paradigms mined which cheapen perfection: to deepen my crimes I ask myself questions…
Can vintaged affliction for starters be shagged?
Are satisfied victims just martyrs in drag?
Yes what of those sailors you suckled in waves?
That fleet of men cuddled then left to their graves?
Each master troubled by freedom from slaves…
Beneath the sheets struggled bereft of enclaves.
Can seamen be free men unshackled from lust?
Can jocks with the cocks that tackled love, trust?
Aching for him in cyber-hereafter, Waiting is cruel when aroused by his laughter, Innocence twisted to meet my demands, My lover handled by innocent hands committing a crime of passion and craving, He thinks that he kills me but my life he’s saving, It’s my lust that drives him and corners him here, He has no idea that I’m not sincere, He thinks me a victim or thinks me a fool, He’s only a pawn providing me fuel to achieve the experience of realized fantasy… Transcending world through beautiful tragedy.
make the muse leave return here tomorrow sleep beneath seas or on Kilimanjaro sleep among stars or men who are nude don’t let the muse prevent or intrude into what gives you strength and what calms your screams your muse will return inspired by dreams