I Hear You

Most of the time
I know how to work it,

And I’m quite disconnected
from my own broken circuit,

But then something sparks
and I’m lost in reflection,

I’m drowning in sound
and rapt by connection.

Those episodes scare me
and I’ve sought to avoid them,

But running from strife
has left my heart frozen,

And the path of my life
is melting my fear…

Allowing his voice to be heard
and quite clear.

He’s the part of me;
wounded and starving and aching.

He’s the one we forgot
when our hearts were done breaking.

He’s the one who kept screaming
though no one was listening.

He’s the one shedding tears
that on my face are glistening.

And I fight for him now
as he’s fought for me.

I fight for his rights
that we both may be free…

The battle is coming,
has happened,
occurred…

And he knows satisfaction because he is heard,

And we fight now together
to achieve correlation,

That was taken when life
divorced integration.

Written by Jason Wright
June 19, 2014

For him and for me.

It’s a start. I think I make it sound a bit Disney when it’s really very dangerous. I’m always on the verge of something lately. Some of it is wonderful. Some of it is horrible. And all of it is necessary.

B.I.O. of a Nameless Lover:

I met you…
millennial,
and we were so young.

You made me alive
and then left me stung.

I loved you for years
then we drifted apart.

Time heals all wounds
yet ripped us apart.

In twenty-eleven,
long after we met…

We randomly crashed
and then cashed in our debt…

But the lust that we shared
and for years we had held…

Was long past it’s date;
by a kiss we were quelled.

Impunity spared us
in memories wasted…

Like missed opportunity:
that’s how you tasted…

In October
bedroom / shower / stairwell…

First time we fucked
was bitter farewell…

Bitter and sweet
and fragrant and gleaming…

Our lust disappointed
compared to our dreaming…

Although we played
quite well in our fashion…

Eleven years time
had drained us of passion.

It was love and was sex
and was brutal and sadness…

Was whatever survived
and revived from our ashes.

And we never talked again
after that day…

You turned to leave
and then I moved away…

Now we never speak
for our love has been strictured…

And all I have left
now of us is our pictures.

Written by Jason Wright
October 28, 2013

For Anonymous: You know who you are and that’s quite enough.

UNBECOMING:

I don’t know who I am anymore.
I don’t know who I am anymore.
I don’t know who I am anymore.
Perhaps I never knew.

I know I’m alive when we are together
but when I’m alone that’s not true.

I’m struggling and flailing
just learning to breathe
searching for clues and for answers.

The truth is I’ve died now
(so many times now)
Perhaps all that’s left are the ashes.

I’m strong and I’m brave
(at least that’s what friends say)
I exist so perhaps they are right.

But the pain that I feel
as I struggle to heal
overwhelms me until I must write.

The nightmares are cursed
but the visions are worse
because comforting lies can still soothe me.

And I fear I won’t ask..
How long can dreams last?
One day my dreams might consume me.

But I don’t want to leave
so I struggle to breathe
and I reach out to family and friends.

I try to learn skills
but the timing still kills
and I know that everything ends.

Written by Jason Wright
July 19, 2013

THE COWBOY AND THE PRIEST

The priest and the cowboy
who murdered each other…

Killed with a kindness
they both thought was clever…

Zombie decay
decomposed into lust…

With nightmares more deadly
than panic or trust…

For shades hide between
what is real and is right…

They look so alive
when seen in the light…

But night time,
it blossoms them into the dying…

They can’t understand
why they’re bleeding and crying…

They can’t understand
why their pain has increased…

And they won’t find the truth
until pain is let loose…

And life can infuse
both cowboy and priest.

Written by Jason Wright
NOVEMBER 5, 2011

On our first Halloween together, Aaron dressed as a cowboy and I dressed as a priest. We went to a party and I got a call from Sean Mobley who let me know that his father had died. The party had a karaoke portion and I saw “Angel” by Sarah McLachlan in honor of Ted.

THE OPPOSITE OF LOVE

You were “the one”,
that’s what my friends said…

But you were a lie
and a ghost in my head…

You’re so insecure
and you struck while I slept…

You made me afraid
it was my fault I wept…

But my life is changing;
Believe me…
It’s true.

You can’t hurt me now:
I’m indifferent to you.

Written By Jason Wright
OCTOBER 27, 2011


For Michael Slaughter –

HATRED ESCAPE

I’m caught in a trap
and I need to get out…

I need to break free
of my own sense of doubt…

I need to believe
that I can survive…

I can’t let myself
be buried alive…

I hate what has happened
to childhood me…

I hate that I listened
to Father’s dark plea…

I hate that the Michael
I knew never stayed…

I hate that my brother
has left me betrayed…

I hate that I hate this;
it just gives me grief…

I hate that my sickness
has trumped my belief…

But I love those I’ve known
and I can’t just desert them…

So I try to keep breathing
and try not to hurt them.

Written by Jason Wright
OCTOBER 27, 2011

For Jason

FOUR DAYS ENCHANTED

Compassion is given;
mistaken for lies…

A powerful weapon,
a question…but why?

Why play such games?
Why smile and sing?

Experience teaches
to not trust such things.

Yet I love the way that he sings a smile
and the way that his intellect reconciles…
Logic,
Success,
And things never guessed…
Except in his eyes
filled with things unexpressed.

He can sing,
He can act,
And in short, do it all…

Yet he doesn’t attack
or make you feel small…

His voice is a gift
you’re lucky to receive…

And the passion he carries
makes you grieve & believe…

Yet the power held there
is most naked and strong…

When he whispers against you
while held in your arms:

In that muted darkness
when he speaks to just you…

It’s then that you see that
his power is true.

It’s not just a game
though it isn’t a promise…

Things don’t always last
when whispered in darkness…

Yet I want to know more
and that’s really quite rare…

And I guess I just want him
to know that I care.

Written By Jason Wright
October 25, 2011

For Aaron Sanko

CIGARETTES FOR DAVID

When I smile for others
or remember through tears…

When I remember my brothers
have been dead for years…

I sometimes light candles
not because I believe…

But more for the action
that allows me to grieve.

But this friend’s alive
so candles seem wrong…

And he’s too far away…
Too grave
and headstrong to not make a gesture
without such regret…

So I raise up my lighter,
To honor the fighter,
A nonsmoker smoking his last cigarette.

Written By Jason Wright
October 20, 2011

For David Hull.
I wish I could do more to help.

TWO DAYS WILL BE TEN

The most perfect kiss
that I’ve ever had…

An innocent bliss
before it went bad…

A smile and glow;
erections and laughter…

That kiss was worth everything;
all that came after.

He passed through my heart
and I barely saw him…

He rips me apart
with the truth of his random
journey through life
and I wish I could hold him…

I wish I could make it alright
and I’ve told him…

I can’t save myself
so I can’t be his savior…

I’m falling apart
and I’m falling from favor…

I’ve crashed to the Earth
and I’m trashed in this crater…

Yet the bliss
of that kiss
still exists ten years later.

Written by Jason Wright
October 16, 2011

For Sean

Sudden Strangers

Such beautiful people;
remarkably strong…

They don’t live forever
and never stay long…

They brush up against you
then kiss you goodbye…

And that’s if you’re lucky
enough to know why.

They make you feel something
and then disappear…

Their absence is painful;
their presence was dear…

This price we all pay
is a heartrending cost…

The feelings we feel
when loved ones are lost.

Written By Jason Wright
October 12, 2011

error: Content is protected !!