As They Say

I wasn’t going to write this.
I wasn’t going to say.

Not gonna tell you at all
but then my thoughts decided to stray.

I wasn’t going to whisper.
I wasn’t going to scream.

Not gonna answer your call
but then our cocks decided to cream.

And then (as they say) it was over.
And then (as they say) we were spent.

And then (as they say) we were sober
but by then we could not repent…

because none of this ever happened;
it was all of it just for a lark…

no matter the truth
which was spent (as they say)
as we went (as they say)
in the dark.

Written by Jason Wright
October 15, 2019

Subjective Completion

Good work today
leaves me shaky
with uncovered thoughts
never spoken aloud before now.

This, in the wake of constantly
inspiring sex magic
and long brewing poetry
which has finally come to fruition.

A culminating event,
seemingly mundane,
but truthfully described as curative,
healthful and life affirming.

I explore, unravel, pursue and consider,
disassemble, examine and unscrew
before I ultimately deliver my masterpiece truth.

Integrated. Realized. Accomplished. Achieved. Finished.

Completed.

Like owning artwork,
finally contained
in the most perfect frame,
worthy of its inspiration
and suitable for display.

Attainment consummated
by way of intimate regimental honesty.

We must,
each and every one of us,
arrive at our own individual conclusions.

Written by Jason Wright
October 14, 2019

Inundated Elegy

of flings everlasting
the cost is abhorrent

of things shaped in passing
things lost in the torrent

depicting December’s
deceased drowned in blood

these six we remember
do not cease the flood

the cold of the water
the brown of the rust

the bold brush with slaughter
which drowned with a thrust

the dicks in stark alleys
baseless surrendering

the tricks in dark valleys
the faceless assembling

the “FAGGOT” in red
painted plain as can be

the pain and the dread
taint the slain with Godspeed

breadth unencumbered
we won’t condescend

death of such number
we don’t comprehend

we sever the wicks
lest the flames lose their touch

yet don’t blame the six
when the rest is too much

Written by Jason Wright
October 14, 2019

For Joseph Reese Anderson
and the countless, often unrecognized victims of the AIDS pandemic.

Aaron Impression

A weekend away
with a view of a river.

Where Waldo was found
to be an underage baby gay
with heavy lidded eyes
and a Southern Comfort smile;
who’d once had his heart broken
after merely two weeks…
but then broken hearts can happen
in far less time than that.

Waldo drove one of Mario’s carts,
homing in on rainbow stripes worn
on bald headed fairy
(more than twice his age),
who was himself besotted with the man
who bore Waldo’s birth name.

Wally danced to oldies
while a former lover’s ghost
strummed his beautiful guitar solos,
before and after which Waldo blushed
beautifully and repeatedly,
endearing himself to his queer tribal elders.

But Wally, having finally been found,
disappeared just as quickly;
no goodbyes, no traces left behind
save vague impressions and random photos
which did not do his memory justice.

Written by Jason Wright
October 12, 2019

For Aaron K.

I hope that you find your way in the world;
it’s all the brighter for having you in it.

The Man (Betwixt Thirtysomethings)

Betwixt thirtysomethings
which no one can master.

Eclipsed by the flings
which grow from disaster.

Unseen by each other
we tumble hereafter.

Between one another we
stumble through laughter.

A man at the heart of us;
breaking and taking…

That man is a part of us:
waking and quaking…

Examine our lawlessness;
humbly and shaking…

The man inside all of us:
hungry and aching.

Amongst us he hides
and displays and divides;

discusses insides
and betrays and collides;

disgusted by nothing
which this man provides;

Us thrusting and blushing
is why the man thrives.

The man wants our souls
and our sex as well…

The man haunts our holes
and affects our farewells…

The man is the devil
and drags us to hell…

The man likes to rebel
without cause to tell.

The man is disruptive
but just below surface.

The man is corruptive
to slaves in his service.

The man is unnerving
but we all deserve this.

The man is a showman
and we are his circus.

The man is a duelist;
subtly jubilant,
brokenly flawless
when facing our youth.

He’s not an exclusionist;
not an illusionist,
openly honest:
embracing our truth.

The man is a gentleman;
shares with us: medicine:
compliments sprayed
and then rubbed into lather.

Man is adrenaline;
snares us with cinnamon,
documents splayed
that when snubbed do not matter.

The man as described
does not quite exist…

The uncircumscribed
subsist in abyss…

But unrecognized
they crawl from our thoughts
and unrealized
they sprawl in our spots…

They twist into something
we wish we could capture;

betwixt thirtysomethings
made squeamish by rapture.

Written by Jason Wright
October 12, 2019

For Christopher, Ahmed & Javier,
who inspired the seed from which this madness sprang.

Janet Lynn

You were my lover
until the night that you weren’t.

You called me Janet…
in the green shaded sunlight streams
(like a stained glass painting)
where we ran naked
beneath that haunted woodland canopy.

I, daring to travel
to forbidden places
which our fathers forbade…
to pluck the rose
whose thorns did prick,
beading blood from innocent skin.

On that final night
you called me Lynn…
(my misspelled middle name)
when I appeared naked before you
on the edge of twilight forest storm clouds;
there, where I was deflowered
by a fairy queen’s decree.

It was there,
in the shadow of such
bewildering and bruising beauty
that you abandoned me,
never to return.

As I had been counseled,
I held tight to myself
when you would have
let me go…

And being unsaved,
I saved myself,
even as you faltered
and fled.

True, I haunted that place
on the following,
on the morrow,
as I brushed past tree limbs
still wet with last night’s
cleansing rain.

I walked to the spot where we’d smoked;
the remains of last night’s victims,
the evidence which proved
that last night’s disaster
had indeed taken place…
a world shattering event
which we have never discussed.

That woodland fairyland
is a cursed place
which returns
to haunt my dreams.

That night I had been transformed
into many creatures,
into many forms,
burned away to nothing
and reborn from the ashes.

Janet and Lynn united in a pairing
you could not possibly conceive of.

And thus combined,
and bereft of your touch,
I stumbled into the morning
to learn what we’d become.

Written by Jason Wright
October 7, 2019

For Michael C.

Trying Times

Try not to scream;
struggle to whisper.

Try to redeem
what was fucked up by scripture.

Try to outline
what can’t be contained.

Try to outshine
what in shadows was shamed.

Try to revive
what in vast strife had chilled you.

Try to survive
what in past life had killed you.

Written by Jason Wright
October 7, 2019

Always

You tell him that sex with me
will be completely emotionless for you,
or at least that’s what I hear without really listening,
but what you truly said is that
our sexual activity
will be completely emotionless for US,
but that’s not wholly accurate…
because I will feel something;
if I didn’t already feel something
I wouldn’t even bother.

You say that people don’t usually
FUCK their ex-boyfriends,
which I find funny
because so far,
they’re the only people I fuck,
and why not?

I’ve loved you for almost as long as I’ve known you
and can’t / won’t force myself to feel nothing.

But there’s NOTHING threatening to others
by this potential reconnecting of interlocking bodies,
because while sex will ALWAYS be emotional for me,
I also hold no illusions that
my having sex with you will bind you to me,
making you a prisoner
to only satisfy my needs,
to only service my pleasure…

Our FUCKING will not reintegrate us
into some magical reiteration
of our former couplehood.

The idea is preposterous.

As preposterous as truth
and as honest as fiction.

Written by Jason Wright
October 2, 2019

For Michael E.

Women

I have kissed women
to sleep with their men.

I have kissed women
to have them again.

I have kissed women
and oft I reflect this:

I have kissed women…
I do not regret this.

Written by Jason Wright
October 1, 2019

Ride

I want to be in bed with you
or maybe just alone.

To just be getting head from you
or sleeping sleep of stone.

Our cocks are strong
(though pills are wrong);
this walking town in blur…

I hate abusive
mindless music;
bliss is my chauffeur.

Written by Jason Wright
September 30, 2019

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