Spider-Noir – BALD JASON'S GAY GOTH BOY BLOG

June 9, 2026June 10, 2026

“Holy Water Cannot Help You Now”

Tough day, which started out good. I had a productive therapy session. I also watched some TV, watching the first episode of “Spider-Noir” and continuing my re-watch of Star Trek: Discovery. The former reminds me a lot of “Agent Carter”, which is a good thing. And the latter viewing featured one of my favorite episodes, so that was all good. I got STD tests on Friday, which all came back clear and that was also good news…

But I had some blood work done at my doctor’s appointment on Friday, which goes with the STD testing. I expected good or great results. I mean, I’ve been more active in the last month. I cut out ice cream a few months ago. I started drinking smoothies. I cut back on chips and snacks. And I’ve been adding fiber to everything for at least a couple of years. I just felt like everything was going great. But it’s not. Oddly, I was fine at my last appointment 3 months ago. So this really knocked me on my ass.

And while I freaked out a bit… I mean, I felt like I was hit by a train, I didn’t cut. I didn’t cry. I didn’t give up. And what I did do was let myself have a Xanax. Then I drank some water and I made an appointment with a nutritionist – because food and I are not the best of friends, and there’s a lot that I don’t understand, so I’ll need that help. And I made an appointment with one of my primary doctors (because I officially have 2). I got outside. I also cancelled my night out with Isaiah and his poetry group. I just didn’t feel up to meeting new people and pretending I was fine. I’m not fine. But I’m also not destroyed. I’ll improve. I can do this. It’s just a bit of an unexpected setback and I don’t think getting better is going to be fun, which sucks.

On top of that I started having horrible lower back pain that can sometimes mean a kidney stone is moving, and I know for certain that I have at least 2, which my doctors have been monitoring on an annual basis. But they have provided me with medication for when these things occur, which I took when I realized something might be going on.

I’m actually very tired. I slept 6 hours last night and expected to sleep more but that didn’t happen. Maybe I’ll get to bed early.

Today’s journal entry song quote is from “Seven Devils” by Florence + the Machine, from their 2011 album “Ceremonials”.

June 8, 2026June 9, 2026

Holding You Until the Sunrise”

I did go right to bed after the last crazy entry. I finished a chapter of “The Downing Girl”. I’ve read it so many times already that part of me feels like there’s no need to finish it this time, and yet I’ve struggled so much with finishing books in the last year that part of me feels it is very important. And I do love this book. Truly. The one thing I don’t like about it as that the narrator repeats sections of the books at least a few times, and so having now read the book something like 15 times, I’ve read those passages 30 times, so I’m a little sick of those bits. lol But it’s my own fault! lol

I slept about 6 hours. Later I took a very brief but very restful nap before getting ready to go to IKEA with Aaron to get a new chair. In the meantime I had a long overdue chat with my old pal Darla DeCook, which was lovely. I’ve lost many people over the years – I mean, they’re dead – so having the luxury or reconnecting with someone is especially appreciated. We’ve both had a rough go of it at times, but we’re both still here. Hopefully we’ll have a phone call or Zoom or whatever in our near future.

I wore crazy earrings today, which were fun – and well received. On the way to and from IKEA, Aaron and I called his mom, his Aunt Karen, his Aunt Denice, his cousin Andrew and Jennifer Clemente. Not everyone answered, but everyone that did was delightful. Jennifer traded texts with me until later when we caught up on the phone while I drank a blueberry smoothie.

After chatting with Jennifer for a bit, about Tap Dancing Lessons, The Lost Boys Broadway musical and Spider-Noir (which she’s watching and I’ve been meaning to start) we said goodnight and I went for a walk where I met up with my friend Christopher Tefft for a brief walkabout while he got food. He was EXHAUSICATED, the poor thing. We might go to a bar together next week. I like that I’m getting out more and trying to connect. It doesn’t always work, but it has been happening more frequently. I also made tentative plans to go to a writers group with Isaiah tomorrow. I have therapy at 1pm. And Wednesday Aaron and I have eye doctor appointments. I will try to juggle these things while further exploring my ever evolving relationship with Aaron, sex, poetry, music, and perhaps dancing. I miss dancing. I dance at home but it’s not the same.

May 22, 2026May 29, 2026

“Can’t Abide The Sun”

Today was rough. We had the repairman in, a lovely man named William. We had another cleaning crew in (who didn’t clean everything we told them to). And we had the realtor. The people that lived here the last 8 or 9 months really fucked this place over. We have roaches now. Furniture I loved is ruined and it’s quite possible that all the downstairs living room furniture and carpeting will need to be replaced! It’s gross. But it’s much better now than when when we arrived just 2 nights ago. We talked about possibly staying a few extra days to help take care of more things (we leave Tuesday) but I didn’t bring any extra medication, only enough to see me through Tuesday night, so that’s out.

Today marks 32 years since I began shaving my head. 32 years as Bald Jason. I was going to go to a bar and toast the occasion but with all the drama today it was one more thing that I didn’t have to do, plus it makes better sense to do it tomorrow night. We’re planning on seeing the new Star Wars movie around 6pm and then maybe going to a bar we like in Orlando for pool, some drinks and people watching. I love meeting and talking to new people so I love going to the bars when we’re here.

I had a few fun talks with Katie today. I traded texts with Janice and our cousin Christopher. And I called Aaron’s cousin Lisa for her birthday.

I’m rereading The Drowning Girl.

The reviews for Spider-Noir seem mostly positive. I’m a huge Marvel fan so I’m interested in this but having been asked what I’m most excited about, it’s VisionQuest. I loved WandaVision and Agatha All Along and VisionQuest is said to the final part of that trilogy. Hopefully it sticks the landing and allows for further adventures of Wanda, Vision, Billy & Tommy.

Oh. And I got outside (briefly) so that’s 20 days in a row! Again, I think the most I’ve been outside on consecutive days (barring vacations) in the last several years is 4 days, so it feels like a big accomplishment. Hopefully I can back into going for my walks when we get home. Walking here would not be great for me. I’m so pale and the sun is so direct. When I was a freshman in high school I came to Florida with the choir and I got a sunburn in my eye. I had to walk around Sea World with an ice pack on my face, which someone diminished the experience of winning the trophy for best choir or whatever it was that we won. We were champions though.

Today’s song quote title is from “Sugar For the Pill” by Slowdive, from their 2017 album, Slowdive. I’ve been listening to them a lot on this trip.