Tag: Inspired by Aaron Sanko

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FOUND

A year ago now
you were lost in the dark
and being alone there
it changed us
I fought hard for you
you fought for me too
we fought for the truth
that estranged us
we struggled with doubt
I smuggled us out
but there in the light
we were strangers
for finding the light
did not make us right
the truth set us free
but with dangers
and it was discovered
the damage we suffered
still plagued us in spite
of our patience
our ignorance threatened
our romance was deafened
we’d nearly been drowned
by complacence
found to be guilty
my love nearly killed me
life is a bitch
an assassin
but time worked it’s magic
became more romantic
we survived by the grace
of compassion
and there on that ledge
we stood on the edge
of a death
that still makes me shudder
and finding us there
beyond our despair
we rescued ourselves
and each other
and now we still struggle
both in dark and in light
but the struggle is real
and you make it alright
for life without fight
is a life without meaning
and a life without plight
to our love is demeaning
this year having passed
profoundly, it’s true
I hope that we last
and I’m glad I found you.

Written by Jason Wright
August 10, 2017

For Aaron

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I Saw Sparks

Men’s eyes can be laughing sparkle,
heavy lidded with hunger or stupor,
dead with rejection,
ghosted with tears,
shaded with guyliner,
or frosted with burning hatred.

All that matters is that they stare
if only momentarily
into my own.

That mind jolt penetrating to the core of inspiration.

That look a month ago –
with listen and spark,
sex and magic –
has yet to be replaced or forgotten.

There are waves
of imaginary men
rolling toward us
with intended potential excitement
but they seem empty,
devoid of spark.

Aaron squared was more
than a somewhat clever joke.

Expanded healing pleasure / honest friendship,
minus the fantasy lies
that fuel countless tear stained orgasms
with an intense burst
of impossible wet dream madness;
a bruising lust which stings
while it drives senses to extremes –
a Cenobite encounter
plagued by hardships
with luscious pleasures
yet to be realized,
yet to curse or release me
through a torturous curative of transformative sex.

My lover’s name twin is sweet
and tempts me with poli-normative affection…
he shames me with his goodness
in the shadowed eclipse of my darkest desires.

His double penetrations are pure spiritual retreats
which offer to halt my advance into the endless abyss
of my deviant sex drenched day dreams.

I still struggle toward the depths
but their darkness seems twice as blinding
after his personal brand of effervescent sparks.

Written by Jason Wright
August 9, 2017

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Busy

In dreams we’re together
in all ways imagined…

A still life that’s painted
in all shades of passion…

When awake we are separate
and it’s not enough…

Unable to talk, to touch
or to fuck…

We share the same space
yet we aren’t complete…

And we cling to each other
at night when we sleep.

Written by Jason Wright
August 3, 2017

For Aaron

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The Aarons

Waiting an hour
for line to die down,

Waiting for queens
to swallow my crown,

Nervous awareness
of people beside me,

The Aarons are rude
and can’t be inside me,

The Aarons are restless
inside of my pants,

The Aarons are separate
in this circumstance,

Each Aaron’s schedule
is packed and excited,

Yet sadly their plans
may keep us divided.

Written by Jason Wright
July 31, 2017

For Aaron and Aaron.

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Smiled Arrival

I’m somewhere familiar;
I’m somewhere surprised…

A month ago walking
with tears in my eyes…

But pain of that moment
cannot touch me now…

The thought of that change
makes me smile somehow…

And it was a nightmare
that I couldn’t shake…

Yet it can’t touch me now
because I am awake.

Written by Jason Wright
July 28, 2017

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The Impossible

I’ve had adventures
and I have explored,
and I had achieved
every possible score,
but you’re taking me further;
you are the key…

Enslaved to desires:
you’re setting me free.

Written by Jason Wright
July 28, 2017

For Aaron

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Playing the Game

He turns to reveal
the pass he has made,
So bad he’s made Vlad
stand erect without aid,
And we wait for response
as I yearn for the trade…
The words go unheard
but once read they degrade.

That’s what I needed.
That’s what I wanted.

I need to be teased.
I need to be taunted.

I need to be damaged
and drowned in their piss.

But in losing the game
I am winning in bliss.

But it’s more than just that;
it’s more complicated…

It’s more than a need
to be masturbated.

The rules are a treasure;
a pleasure inflamed…

When we must explore…

Our lives and more…

We gamble and score
in the shame we call game.

Written by Jason Wright
July 26, 2017

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Formative Words

A month ago broken
yet we still exist.

Those words that were spoken
by Aaron persist

In shaping our future;
his words were not wasteful.

His words were a cougar
that fed on the faithful.

His words were confession
to me as his priest.

His words were a question
to my ears bequeathed.

His words begged an answer;
I wept as I gave it.

Our love had a cancer
but we sought to save it.

He by admission
and I by permission…

We both fought to save us
from death by attrition…

The pain from his past
held our love in a casket…

For future transgression
he begged with a question
I responded when asked it:

“You need it? Then have it.”

The distance between us
once traveled would heal us,

And words that were spoken
could not now conceal us,

And so we embraced
what would now become real,

Free from the pain that
we both had to feel,

Free to make choices
denied before changes,

To use our own voices
describing new strangeness,

The action is called;
we respond to sensation…

The laws of attraction
beyond transformation.

Written by Jason Wright
July 25, 2017

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Start of Darkness

After night of
angry exhausted questions…

Loaded with
doubt / jealousy / rejections…

Expressing the pain
and the pleasure we feel…

My bitch of a stomach
could not seal the deal.

Tears fall from eyes
I’ve rinsed and repeatedly
cleaned as I’ve organized
words that defeated
and tore me asunder
like peace disappeared
with the heat of the summer
and ice of my fears
with soul crushing weight
of tears from my lover:

We all know the heart is the loneliest hunter.

I’m so very tired
and I’ve hated this night…

But my symptoms are clear
and I know what is right.

I hurt him with thoughts
that he never guessed.

Jealous reminder
of that man undressed.

Devouring fear
that seldom ignores me,

As Aaron convinces…
As Aaron implores me
to live my own life
in spite of my sickness.

My life of death
undone by our quickness.

Tonight illness won
and I know deep regret.

Time to wake up
and I haven’t slept yet.

Written by Jason Wright
July 21, 2017

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Prostrated

Today,
during my prostate exam,
Doctor said he was sorry
as he inserted a single finger.

I told him it was fine.

I wanted to say (but didn’t)
that he could use more than one.

I didn’t say
that his finger felt amazing
but was only a shadow of what
I’d felt earlier on Sunday morning.

The exam was brief and painless,
but left me wet.

My doctor is a horrible tease.

The doc says everything’s great
and that there’s no blood;
no sign for worry;
no cause for alarm.

I nearly ask him to try again
but instead I give thanks
while marveling that I remain
both physically and spiritually
intact.

Written by Jason Wright
July 11, 2017

“Prostrated” was written in a mad rush of notes, this being the first completed piece. The others were later finished in October and this became the final entry in a trilogy that was released later.

Also (and this may be Too Much Information), what I remember about this exam (which I’ve had every 3 months for years) was that I was curious if there would be any problems, because 2 days before, I had experienced double anal penetration in a threesome, which was the first time I’d ever done that. I felt great, so I thought everything was fine, but it was nice to have it confirmed by my doctor! And now you know…

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