48 Random

It’s Thursday night
and I have my group.

Aaron leaves before me
for his meeting
and he kisses me goodbye.

Other Aaron,
the Aaron that we share,
that Aaron messages us both
about loneliness and homophobia.

Mark messages me about my Aaron’s former employers.

I see that Michael is in town and let him know
I’ll be in the village around nine,
near Stonewall,
on Christopher Street.

Christopher calls me on the train
and though the timing is down to the wire
I tell him I’ll stop by if I can.

Poetry pours out of us in faster than usual process.

Michael can see me but I meet him at his hotel near Times Square
to be closer to Chris’s Washington Heights.

We go to Blazing Saddles, Rise past Posh / Industry
to Ivy because the straighter crowd isn’t obsessed with RuPaul.

He drinks margaritas. I drink whiskey.
We talk about our decade old relationship;
how he had fallen for me before I had fallen for him,
only much too late – such terrible timing,
but at least we’re friends now!

We talk about Mark, who messaged me earlier,
how our relationship / friendship extends over years,
and I told him about Aaron / Aaron & Christopher.

I walked him back to his hotel with a quick kiss
and a big hug
before catching the A train (from 42nd to 175th)
where I stumble
sleepily to Christopher’s new apartment
and we crawl through someone’s bedroom window
to take in the remarkable view.

Later he tells me about life
and we trade stories before I stumble home
in the dark Friday morning.

Saturday, Aaron drives Michael & I to
the New York City AIDS Memorial.

Michael saw “Afterglow” the night before;
a wonderful play filled with naked men,
and believe me, I’ve seen them.

We walk to the Stonewall National Monument in Christopher Park,
the Stonewall Inn, past the Ad Hoc Collective Cafe
(where my poetry meetings are held),
past PIECES and then catch a train down to Chinatown & Little Italy
so I can get some jewelry.

Later we head to Central Park by way of Marvel headquarters
and the Columbus Circle Shops to meet some of his friends
who we somehow never connect with.

We walk to the Bethesda Fountain
which we love because it’s in “Angels in America”
and it’s where the Avengers parted ways…
before heading back to Columbus Circle so he can attend
“Naked Boys Singing” and I can catch a train back to the Heights
so I can shower, put on something warmer and go meet Aaron
and several of our friends for a birthday celebration
in Jock Douchebag Heaven
which as it so happens,
ends up being in the Meatpacking District.

Written by Jason Wright
April 15, 2018

Sirens

Tonight
after haunted days of painful painlessness
a siege of sirens comes
to serenade, seduce and succor…
to simplify…
to supply me with solace
as I drown
beneath waves of mutilation
(with apologies to Pixies).

My Aaron sings to me
his soothing tones
which are less like music;
more like verse…
strumming my ribcage
beneath salt water seas,
we swim naked for hours
through tears we’ve not shed.

The other Aaron,
the Aaron between us,
he haunts through
photograph, text and memory,
echoing across time and geography
to be one with us again.

There are naked hungry men
beneath those shadowed depths,
those sombre shades of green
lit by melancholy movie soundtracks.

The mermen dive for pleasure
and breathe truthfully through gilled
fantasy lies which excite and entice me
before dragging me down to my death.

In amber and glow,
through fogged glass of sunken ships
she is weeping her mermaid crocodile tears.

This is not truly Jamie;
this being is not my sister or my therapist.
The former doesn’t speak to me, even on land
and the latter will soon be lost to me –
just as I left her (unforgivably)
in the haste of my waking nightmare.

She will forgive me this unforgivable sin.

She is strong but she is wounded –
like me,
underwater –
like me,
and she will rise again –
like me.

Could this truly be her after all?

I smile and wave goodbye to her
but she can’t see me until Thursday.

Mermaid simulacrum smiles just the same…
but here my visions come to an end.

Written by Jason Wright
August 17, 2017

For Aaron Squared & Jamie Bloom

Aaron Squared

Two men tormented
by men who are blind.

Two men prevented
from men they must find.

Two men inside me
who I may find care in…

Despise
the unwise
who would dare
to scare Aaron.

These parts of me
named
should not feel
ashamed.

Each of us beautiful; one and the same.

And I may be biased
in my manifesto…

But Aaron should listen
because Jason says so.

Written by Jason Wright
July 9, 2017

Party of Three

Before he arrived
he was funny & flirting.

Two weeks before,
I was bloody and hurting.

My partner was lost
and was struggling the same.

We all nearly cancelled
because of our pain.

But we all arrived here
at that fateful hour.

We all deprived fear
of it’s hateful power.

We unguarded trust
and connected and shared.

Discarded and thrusted
past all we’d laid bare.

The same wavelength reached
unobscured by hostility.

We each found our strength
within vulnerability.

We all came together
and found more than just fun.

The best of both worlds
wrapped up into one.

Written by Jason Wright
July 9, 2017

For Aaron

Epilogue

If the dark of Seattle
makes you start
to seem marginal,

Let me remark that
you are remarkable.

Insightful and vivid;
you are such a vision.

That others would
hurt you for spite or religion
brings tears to my eyes,
and I barely know you.

And it’s not just because
I loved being below you.

You’re kind and you’re funny;
you’re cute and you’re daring.

You’re sexy and charming
and layered and caring.

You have much to give;
don’t be shy or reluctant…

Because some lucky guy
will want you for a husband.

And you’ll be amazing,
I should know
’cause I’ve met you.

No one who knows you
could ever forget you.

Written by Jason Wright
July 9, 2017

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