·We danced Friday night
to that Friday night music –
The passion was there
but I chose to refuse it –
The sobering sight
of the children & their pride –
The heat & the night
drew us all out from inside.
The girl by my side
& the others who knew me –
They all made me smile
& they all saw right through me –
They all knew my weakness
for people & laughter –
They all knew I wanted
the boy who came after:
The boy dressed in orange.
The candy: raspberry.
His friends were delicious.
His laughter was cherry.
Our goodbye was a smile.
The night was colossal.
I always find joy
when I’m profoundly hostile.
Written by Jason Wright
May 6, 2000
For Melissa, Lee C, M.V., Maggie, Laurie, & Dawn,
but mostly for Shawn – who’s reply made me smile.
Edit:
The artwork was meant to replicate the traffic that night in Ann Arbor. The above version is an expanded view of the original, which I’ll share here:
Melissa was a girl that my then roommate and ex-bf Mark Adams was trying to date. I drove us to the bar after getting food and stopping at a bank.
Lee C & M.V. were men I knew from online on GAY DOT COM (remember when that was a thing?), and though our paths crossed a couple of times, I never knew their full names, so I don’t know what ever became of them.
I met Shawn Foreman that night, along with Maggie Ernst, Laurie Prater and their friend Dawn. I dated Shawn and I was in love with him for years. That night he had noticed the scars on my wrists which endeared him to me right away, but I was pretty bitchy, even as I was trying flirt with him and he called me (with some affection) “profoundly hostile”. When he read this poem he reevaluated his opinion of me. We dated briefly, but intensely. We later hooked up a couple of more times over the years. And I last saw him in person in October of 2011, just 21 days before I met my partner, Aaron Sanko. But he and I still trade messages now and again.
Maggie became a close friend but I later learned she was a compulsive liar, to me and about me. I dropped her on the spot, which was quite painful. I think Dawn visited me once with Maggie but I vaguely remember her and I hashing it out over gay rights and religious bullshit, which I believe ended with me calling her “a pathetic Jesus Licker”, which seemed to offend her at least as much as I’d hoped that it would and she never spoke to me again – which I considered mission accomplished – good riddance. Laurie is simply one of the most remarkable people I’ve ever met and we still trade messages occasionally – I last saw her in person at a Michigan theater in July of 2021.
Jason (05-08-26)
